


Forbidden

by Jojo_Joon



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Childhood Friends, F/M, Family Drama, Fluff and Angst, Forbidden Love, Gen, Horny Reiner, Morning Sex, POV First Person, Romance, Shower Sex, Slow Burn, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-17 08:14:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 15,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28971162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jojo_Joon/pseuds/Jojo_Joon
Summary: Falling in love with an Eldian Warrior isn't as easy as it looks. There's so many obstacles in the way but you don't care.
Relationships: Reiner Braun/Bertolt Hoover/Annie Leonhart, Reiner Braun/Reader
Comments: 12
Kudos: 100





	1. How We Met

“Y/N, remember not to talk to any Eldian devils on your way to school or back. We don’t want our Marleyan status to get tainted”. 

“Yes, mother, I’ll be careful”, I told her without promising. I never believed that we should live in a world where an entire race has to repent for sins that someone committed 2,000 years back into the past. 

I slipped my shoes on, tied the laces and walked out the door. I gave my worried mother one last smile before waving her goodbye. As I walked to school, my mind couldn’t help but wonder past the barriers that block us from them. I decided to take a walk along the internment zone since it is on the way to school. 

The other children walked past me, running and joking with one another as I watched. I was never one to be social. Your typical introvert? That’s who I am, and I don’t have a problem with it. I’m happy just by being alive. Conversing with my mother was already tiring enough, imagine having to actually keep up a conversation just for entertainment. Most of them aren’t who they say they are. 

As I walked along the chain-linked fence that separates them from us, I noticed that the houses were a lot like ours. Except that it wasn’t as fancy or big as the ones on our side of the fence. There were families on the inside and they looked as normal as any other Tom, Dick or Harry. They were laughing and giggling like the rest of us would. One mother is even scolding her child just like how my mother would scold me. They were no different than the people who lived on my side of the fence. If only this fence didn’t exist and peace had replaced it. One can only hope.

As I walked further down, I noticed children my age playing with one another and made my way to where they were. Obviously I couldn’t go in there so I stood on the other side, watching them curiously. Tilting my head, I gasped in awe as I watched them turn five little pebbles into a game. One was tossed into the air with one hand, and once it’s in the air the objective was to pick up one pebble before trying to catch the falling pebble as it came down. They repeated it until they were able to pick up all four pebbles, including the one falling. I’m sure they could hear me but decided to ignore me. They would occasionally steal glances in my direction and I would give them a smile. I was about to say something before someone approached. 

“Don’t you have somewhere to be, kid?” I turned towards the direction of the voice and noticed a Marleyan soldier standing with a rifle in his hand. “You don’t have a band on your arm, yet you’re lingering around here. Get lost before someone catches you”. 

“Mmm, don’t you have somewhere to be sir?” I said, staring at him while cocking my head to the side in curiosity before giving him my killer smile. 

Clicking his tongue in annoyance he raised his rifle preparing to hit me with the butt of it before one of the kids yelled at him. 

“Oi! Don’t you have anything else to do other than trying to abuse little children like us?” A boy with blonde hair said. He was bold and fearless but you know deep down that he wasn’t. It was an act he put up because he knows that he’s lacking in some sort of way and having a big ego helps fill that hole. “If you don’t leave, I’ll report you”.

“You Eldian scums are the devils”, he said before stomping the opposite direction. The boy with the blonde hair made his way towards the fence. He was about the same height as me now but when he gets older, he might tower over me. 

“Hi, I’m Y/N. Thanks for what you did back there”, I reached my hand out and squeezed it in between one of the diamond shaped holes that created a chain linked fence. The boy stared at it with surprise. He must’ve realized that I was Marleyan. A Marleyan that’s willingly handing out her hand for him to shake. He reached out hesitantly before making contact with my hand, giving it a firm shake. 

“Reiner”, he said. 

“Reiner”, I repeated softly, “Nice to meet you. Do you want to walk with me to school?” His eyes wide with disbelief at my sudden request for an Eldian company. “Truthfully, I don’t really care that you’re Eldian or whatever. I just see a person who is around my age, with hair, mouth, nose and ears in front of me. Not a devil”. Giving him a reassuring smile, he relaxed a little before deciding to walk with me. 

We would meet here everyday until we couldn’t anymore. No one suspected a thing, even his friends would join in on our conversation sometimes. They were allowed to leave the internment zone if only they were wearing their arm band. We would all meet in secret at the valley near the town, talking and laughing with one another. 

Four years passed too quickly for my liking when Reiner, Annie, Bertholdt, met me at our usual spot with sadness in their eyes. 

“Hey, what’s going on?” I asked, burrowing my brows together. 

“We are the new inheritors of the Nine”, Annie said. She sounded a little less happy than she normally would. But isn’t it a good thing that they were chosen? Their status as Marleyans are secured now, even though they are Eldians. 

“Aren’t you all happy?” 

“Well, we actually came to say goodbye. Now that we’re chosen, we are going to be busy preparing for our mission. And as someone who inherited the Nine, we only get 13 more years to live”, Bertholdt said with a tinge of regret to his voice.

“Wait, 13 years?!” I swallowed before turning my head to look at Reiner. I saw the sadness in his eyes which confirmed my question. Which means he’ll be gone by the time he turns 23. I felt the familiar prick of tears come in before they fall endlessly down my cheeks. I grabbed the whole lot of them into a hug and we all sobbed together. “Will I see you guys again before you leave for your mission at least?” I asked with hope. 

“Maybe”, Annie replied. “It’s getting late, I should get going”, she said as she wiped away her tears. 

“Yea, me too”, Bertholdt said as he got up to leave with Annie which leaves me and Reiner alone. 

The cool air blew across my skin, fanning me as I watched the sun set in the horizon. The color or purple and pink painted the sky as I think of what my future would be now. Now that they’re gone, what will I do? 

“Will you come see me before you leave?” I asked Reiner, hoping to get a more definite answer. 

He walked his way towards me before pulling me into a tight hug. I couldn’t help but bury my face into his neck. I didn’t want to lose the only friends I’ve ever made. Knowing the risks of what they might do, I might never see them again. He lets go of me with eyes filled with unshed tears. 

“I promise I’ll meet you before I leave for my mission. I’ll meet you here 2 years from now”, Reiner choked out as he held in his cries. 

“Promise?”

“Promise”. I held out my pinky and his pinky wrapped around mine as we both kissed our thumbs, locking in our promise.


	2. The Promise

2 Years Later

As promised, I waited for Reiner at the valley. It was late into the night before he finally made his appearance. He ran towards me as if someone was chasing him. He finally reached me huffing as he tried to catch his breath and gain his composure. I couldn’t help but laugh which caused him to laugh as well. 

“Sorry it took me so long but I had to sneak out without anyone catching me”, he explained. 

“It’s okay, I understand. You needed to say goodbye to your family as well”. 

“I hope you didn’t wait too long for me”, he chuckled while scratching the back of his neck. 

“No, not at all”, you lied. “Anyway, I made you a goodbye sandwich but since you decided to take your time I ate it instead!” I pointed my nose up into the air with my eyes closed before opening one to see his reaction. His face was beet red, probably from running but his eyes were looking at me with a sense of fondness. I cleared my throat while clearing my mind in the process before turning towards him. 

I rummaged through my pocket and pulled out a handkerchief with an embroidered ‘R’ and small flower next to it. I wanted to add a heart but thought that would make it a little too obvious for him. I extended my hand out to give him his gift. 

“What’s this?” he asked. 

“It’s a handkerchief. What does it look like to you?” I said nonchalantly. Clearing my throat, I looked down to my feet to hide the blush that was creeping on my cheeks. “I made it for you, so technically it’s special because it’s one of a kind”. 

“Did you make one for the others or just me?” He asked curiously which made my adolescent heart skip a beat. 

“Pfft, I would if I had time for it”, I lied again, this time while waving my hands out in front of me. He hummed and nodded at my reaction before taking a step closer. He pulled out a chain from his pocket and wrapped it around my neck. A necklace, he got me a necklace as a farewell gift. My eyes pricked with tears as I felt my emotions get the best of me. 

“I wanted to get you something that will always remind you of me. So I got the pebble that I played when I first met you and turned it into a necklace. It’s not much but I hope you don’t forget about me”. 

“Forget about you? How can I forget about you Reiner? You were literally the first friend I’ve ever made. You’ve left a giant imprint in my life, I don’t think I will be able to forget you no matter how hard I try”, I cried out while pulling him into a hug. “Reiner, come back to me please. I beg you, please”. His hands wrapped around me as if to assure me that he will and also to comfort me if he doesn’t. 

We parted ways and began our lives without one another. We both in the dark on how each other was doing. I’ve sent letters but never received a reply. I did it for a year before I eventually just stopped. I came up with a crazy idea that if I made my way into the military clinic to volunteer, I might meet him there. I waited and waited until I was of age to be married. My mother tried to match me up with a nice gentleman but I couldn’t see myself marrying him. So, I scared the poor guy away. Along with the many others after that. Somedays I would stand under the stars where we all used to meet and wonder if he was looking up at the same star as I am. 

On my 17th birthday I had officially become a nurse thanks to all the volunteer work I was able to do. It meant that I can now support my family and hopefully live on my own in the future. I decided to work for the Military Hospital and deploy out if they needed an extra set of hands. It was tiring seeing people come back traumatized and injured. Some were on the verge of death while others lost a limb or two. 

Everyday after work, I would walk down to the valley and lay down onto grass. My hands brush through the blades, letting the coolness of it take my sorrows away and bury them deep into the ground. It was always quiet out here but it was eerily quiet today. It was as if time stood still for a moment, letting me breath and think for once. I heard footsteps approaching from the distance and slipped my hand into my pocket. Searching for the handle to my blade, I was prepared to strike anyone who was coming through. 

“It’s been awhile hasn’t it Y/N?” A deep baritone voice broke through the silence as he loomed over me. I couldn’t see his face until he knelt down next to my head. I gripped my blade ready to pull it out when I noticed hazel eyes staring back at me. It was Reiner no doubt, just a little older. Whatever he did down there has left him exhausted and remorseful.

I turned to my side before pushing myself from the palms of my hands to sit on my heels. The person who I’ve been waiting for is here, right in front of me. I lunged to hug him and we both fell back onto the ground, laughing as we did. His arms wrapped around me tight, never wanting to let go. I can feel my tears soaking through his shirt. He sniffed and pulled away before brushing a strand of hair away from my face to tuck it behind my ear. We stayed like this for a while, afraid that if we moved, the other would disappear. I wanted to ask about the others but decided best not to. We laid under the stars till the next morning, worrying my mother as to why I didn’t return.


	3. Lies and Deceit

It was probably about five in the morning before we decided that we should both go home and get some rest. We sat there, laughing and talking the entire night. It wasn’t even five years worth of conversation. That’s how much time we’ve lost. I’ve come to find out that the people on the island of Paradis were really just normal people like you and me. There were no horns or any devil-like features, like how my mother always portrayed them. 

Reiner also ended up telling me about Annie and Bertholdt. He didn't go much into detail about it but told me enough that I know they're no longer going to be coming back. It made me sad, but I can only hope that they are in a better place now. He walked me home only to stop a couple blocks down so as to not get caught by my mother. I waved him a silent goodbye before sneaking into my home. 

I opened the front door quietly enough to not wake my mother up. I slipped into the crack and silently closed the door behind me. Sighing a breath of relief, I dropped my shoes by the door and walked up towards my room when I heard the floorboard creak in the living room. 

"Where have you been, Y/N?" My mother said from across the room. 

"I was at work. The hospital needed help so I stayed behind". I gulped down my lie and watched as her face contorted into disappointment. 

"Mmm", was all she said before walking past me to go up into her room. I couldn’t tell if my mother was upset that I lied or if she was upset that I was working too much. I scrubbed my face with my hands before following her up the stairs and into my bedroom. I was glad that today was my day off so that I could sleep the day away but I promised Reiner that I'd meet him for dinner at one of the restaurants down in the plaza. Smiling at the thought of meeting him tonight, I plopped myself onto the bed and let sleep take me. 

I woke up as the sun was setting down. Sitting up on my bed, I stretched my arms over my head before heading towards the bathroom to freshen up. I brushed my hair and put half of it up and the other half loose then, I washed my face and put on my most presentable outfit. It was a black high waist skirt with a button down blouse tucked into it. Opening my bedroom door, I peeked my head out towards my mothers room. I felt the weight lifted from my shoulders after seeing her door was closed, which usually means she was probably inside reading. 

Leaving the door ajar, I went back into my room and grabbed my black heels that I would wear on special occasions. The last time I wore these was when they pinned me at my nursing ceremony. I peeked my head out again, making sure that it's closed before tip-toeing out the door and down the stairs. Upon reaching the front door, I put the heels on and quietly leave for the evening. 

Half way down the block, I bumped into Reiner, who happened to be muttering to himself. He was still in his uniform which informed me that he probably just got out of work. Seeing how he hadn't noticed me, I tip-toed towards his back and poked him on the side which caused him to jump a little. I couldn’t help but laugh at his reaction. 

"Did you just get off?" I asked, even though I already knew the answer. 

He nodded at me before clearing his throat. "You look beautiful", his voice cracked which caused him to clear his throat again. 

We made our way through town and laughed at the silliest little things. Like what that man and women were arguing about or what that barking dog was saying to his owner. Anything to forget the last five years he had to endure. I wanted him to smile, laugh and try to enjoy life while he still has it. I know he's harboring some guilt within himself for what had happened on the island and I know that it just doesn't go away. But I want to be there to at least ease some of his burdens. Maybe it's the nurse in me talking but I do care about Reiner. 

When we reached the restaurant, multiple people, or should I say Marleyans, were looking at us like we were freaks. We heard the whispers of their criticism as we made our way to the table. Reiner pulled out the chair for me and the whispers got louder. 

Choosing to ignore the negativity, I took my seat and never let my eyes leave Reiner. Somehow the sight of him comforts me. I can tell he's uncomfortable at what was being said, so I reached my hand across the table with my palm facing upwards. As if understanding my intentions, he put his hand in mine and I noticed his body relaxed as I gave his hand a tight squeeze. 

The waiter that came to grab our order looked annoyed as if she didn't want to be here. "What would you like to drink?" Her tone was full of disgust.

"I think I'll have a glass of red wine, would you like one too Reiner?" 

"But the wine-", I raised my hand up silencing her. I may not look or act it but I'm pretty well known around here. After my father passed away, my mother inherited quite a bit from him. We've always thought he was just a lowly merchant but after receiving his inheritance, we realized he wasn't. We were never able to find out his true identity, and no one around us seem to either. But as time went on, we realized we didn't care who he was in the past because he loved us and we loved him, that was all that mattered. 

Reiner looked up at the waiter and then back at me before shaking his head no. "I'll just have a glass of water". 

"Sure, one glass of water and a glass of red wine. It'll be out shortly". She rolled her eyes before stomping away and disappearing into what I assume is the kitchen. I pulled my hands back towards my lap, fisting my skirt at the service we just received. I could sense every single person staring at me and it made me feel miniscule. It was like I was being observed and if I did one wrong move or worse, if Reiner made a move, we would both be labeled as traitors to our kind. 

Before I could say anything a lady, who looked around my mother’s age, walked up to me. She did seem familiar but I couldn't place a name to the face. She gave me a malice grin before leaning her lips next to my ear. 

"I see you’re into spreading your legs for the devils " She whispered. My eyes widened at her sudden remark. I kept my eyes locked onto Reiner before shutting them and turning my head to look at the lady. 

"Can't I just have a nice meal with my friend?" I snapped. 

"Oh Y/N… Isn't this the man you turned my son down for?” She said in a cunning tone. So that's who she is. She's the mother of the man I was first betrothed to not too long ago. 

“M’am, I don’t know what relationship you think that we have but she clearly is just a friend. Nothing more. An Eldian and Marleyan cannot be together. One always ends up leaving the other, either through death or abandonment. We can both agree that isn't what we want”. To hear Reiner say that hurts me a little. Maybe I wanted something more than just friendship from him. I looked at him pained from the words he used. He gave me an apologetic look before shifting his gaze back towards the lady. 

“Oh my, just friends? The way she’s dressed tonight doesn’t look like you’re just her friend”, she chuckled. “She didn’t meet my son all dressed up even though they were betrothed, instead she wore her work uniform and was covered in blood. Scaring him away. Not just him but many other men that her mother set her up with too. It seems that she’s just a whore who likes to sleep with Eldian devils like you!” She grabbed a pitcher of water from another table and poured it all over me. 

I gasped as the cold water hit my skin and the ice cubes slipped into the cleavage of my blouse. 

“Do you think my son wanted to be with you? Did you really think that he wanted to be with a lowly born Marleyan? He only did it because he pitied your mother. He promised her when he was just a child that he would take care of you after your father passed and for what? For you to harshfully turn him down. Is my family not good enough that you have to succumb to the devil himself?” Anger laced her voice as she raised the hand with the pitcher above her head ready to strike me when Reiner grabbed onto her wrist. 

“Let go of me you scum!” She gritted through her teeth. “I said let go!”

“I didn’t pick your son as a husband not because he wasn’t good enough for me but because he was already in love with someone else”. I explained. 

“No, you’re lying. He would’ve told me”, she said as she shivered at the truth. 

“It’s true, I didn’t know him that well but from what I can tell he was already planning on marrying her until you reminded him of the promise he made to my mother. Oh and it wasn’t because he was going to take care of me, it was because he wanted our family’s fortune. Turns out his lover is pregnant as well. Congratulations, you’re going to be an amazing grandmother!” I clapped my hands together and stood up from the chair, watching as the ice that was in my shirt and lap, fell to the ground.

Losing the strength in her legs, she leaned onto the table before stumbling to the floor, ashamed of what she just did. I looked at her one last time before walking towards the exit with Reiner following closely behind me. As we walked out of the restaurant the cold breeze hit my skin, causing me to shiver due to the wet state of my clothes. Reiner must’ve noticed because he began taking off his coat and putting it over me. I gave him a nod, silently thanking him for the coat as we walked together in silence until we reached the valley. As soon as my feet touched the grass, I took off my shoes and let the ground take away the event that just unfolded before me. I held in my breath before sighing out heavily. 

“Sorry you had to witness that'', I said as I sat down on the grass. “Don’t think that they were reacting because I was with you. It was because of me and my stubbornness. I wasn’t going to marry someone I didn’t love. Especially someone who has a kid on the way”. 

Reiner walked his way next to me before deciding to lay down on the ground. “Yea I get that. I wouldn’t either. My first priority would be to marry the girl I knocked up, not fulfill some promise I made as a kid”, he laughed. He’s actually laughing at the situation which made my heart feel a little at ease. “It’s funny when you think about it… They call us devils when they themselves act like one”. 

Looking up into the night sky, I couldn’t help but agree with what he just said. Marleyans treat Eldians like they’re dirty creatures that they are force to feed to keep alive. When in reality, if they just decided to come close and clean the dirt, they would've realize that they’re not as dirty as they think they are. 

“Reiner?”

“Hmm?”

“Do you think you’ll ever fall in love?” There was silence. Nothing could be heard except for the cicadas and the rustling of the wind. 

“Only if she can love all of me. The good and the bad. And at this point I think that there are more bad than there is good”, he said barely loud enough for me to hear. 

I put my cheek on the top of my knees so that I'm facing him. The dark of the night covered a lot of his features but his eyes always manage to catch my attention. It always showed the truth about Reiner even if he didn't know it at the time. 

“Well, I think that there’s a lot of good in you too Reiner. You don’t see it yet but you will soon”. I stood up and brushed the dirt off his coat I was wearing. My stomach grumbled reminding me I haven't had anything to eat all day and I was hungry. Pulling him up by the arm, I look him in the eye before telling him that we should actually get dinner this time.


	4. Caught

We decided to stop and get food from the stalls. I was hungry enough that I could literally eat anything. Stopping at a stand that oozed with the smell of meat, I ordered four pieces of meat on sticks. Two for me and two for Reiner. I devoured the two sticks I had while Reiner was still on his first. He offered his second stick to me but I denied it. I couldn’t eat his food, he probably didn’t eat all day either. 

“You know, this situation reminds me of a person I met while I was on the island. She was always so hungry and all she wanted to eat was meat. I’ve gotten used to having my meat stolen off my plate so I wouldn’t mind if you took it”. His eyes glimmered as he thought about the memory. Was she someone special to him? You couldn’t help but grin and tease him about it. 

“Did you like her?” I asked blatantly. 

“I liked her as a person but that is about it”. 

“No, I mean did you like her as in, were there feelings?”

“I mean I was always feeling annoyed at her stealing everyones food”. I smacked my hand to my head and groaned at how oblivious he is sometimes. All he did was chuckled at my reaction and gave my shoulder a nudge. 

As we continued walking down the path, a stand full of alcoholic cider caught my attention. I skipped my way towards it and ordered two glasses. I handed Reiner one as he sipped onto it while I chugged my mug’s contents down. I must've been really thirsty because I didn’t even feel the burn of the alcohol on my throat. About 10 minutes later, I started to feel a light buzz. It felt light and woozy but it made me happy and giggled at everything around me. 

I saw a dark alley and made my way towards it, usually I wouldn’t be this stupid but the alcohol is giving me a boost of courage. As we stood in front of the alleyway, I turned towards Reiner with a mischievous grin plastered on my face. I asked him if he'd ever walked down here. Legend says that there’s a female ghost that lurks down here, stealing the virginity of men and then leaving them naked for the military police to find them. He laughed and shook his head, I pulled out the pebble that he gave me from when we were 12 and pulled it off my neck. I grabbed his hand and turned it over palm side up, placing the pebble in there. 

“This pebble has given me courage the last five years. It will now give you courage and protect you from the female ghost that lurks in these shadows”, I said giggling. 

He stood there flabbergasted that I would still carry the pebble. It was an eyesore to some but it was beautiful to me. His makeshift rope necklace that held the pebble broke three months into wearing it, so I had a professional build me something that can hold the pebble. 

His hand closed around the pebble as he looked down at me. The alcohol helped hide my burning blush that was on my cheeks. 

"You still have this?" He asked. 

"Of course!" I smiled. "Why wouldn't I? Don't tell me, you've lost the handkerchief that I spent hours on!" I said playfully dramatic as I brought my arm up onto my forehead. "I even got nicked by that stupid needle more than once", pouting as I brought my hands towards his face. 

Laughing, he grabbed onto my hands before bringing it up to his lips kissing each finger. He laughed even harder after seeing the way I reacted. My eyes must've popped out of the socket by the way he's laughing. My ears heated as he let go of my hands before pinching my cheeks. 

"If you act like a child, I'm gonna treat you like one!" He said while still laughing his ass off. 

A lightbulb lit inside my head. If he was willing to kiss my boo-boo away, it might just work. 

Pouting my lips I pointed at it. This might work or it might backfire and he'll never talk to me again. I hope it's the latter. 

"I got a boo-boo", I said in a baby voice. 

He looked at me and laughed harder. My face turned all red before he grabbed onto my chin gently making my head tilt up towards him. He leaned in close, licking his lips which caused my heart to race. 

"Where? Here?" He thumbed my lips before grazing it back and forth. I gave him a small nod as his head leaned in. I closed my eyes and puckered my lips, ready for a kiss when I heard my mother yelling for me. 

"Y/N! What are you doing?!".

Reiner let go of my chin and stepped back behind me, bowing his head to greet my mother. She looked at his arm band then towards him and back at me. Her face furious as she walked towards me. 

"I came to see if the rumors were true about you frolicking with the devils. Seeing how you're with a warrior, they must be true". Grabbing me by the crook of my elbow, she began pulling me towards the direction of our home. "Is this what you were doing last night? Is that why you came home at the crack of dawn? What did I tell you about talking to the devils? You'll taint us all!" 

I stopped dead in my tracks and pulled my arm away from her grip. She stared at me in horror before trying to grab a hold of me again. I jerked my arm away from her and took a step back, bumping into a solid Reiner. His hands caught me by the shoulder and he gave it a tight squeeze. My mom didn't seem too happy that an Eldian was touching me. Her nostrils flared and her face turned red in anger. 

"Get your hands of my daughter", she hissed out. 

"Mother-". 

"No! Y/N, you promised me", she interrupted me. 

"No, I never promised you anything", I countered. She walked over to me and slapped me hard across the face. My hands shot up to my reddened cheeks to ease the burning pain. Unshed tears filled my eyes and I saw my mother huffing angrily in front of me. 

"You're going to be the death of us Y/N". Her eyes welled with tears as she turned to walk away from me. "I expect you to say your goodbyes and to never see one another again. You are to wed with one of the men I set you up with. No objections


	5. Goodbye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update! I was so behind on school! Hope you enjoy this chapter, it's going to be the start of a new beginning for MC next!

The night air was colder than usual tonight, the wind was quiet and the scent of rain lingered even though there hadn't been rain in awhile. After the incident with mother, Reiner returned my necklace back and gave me a delicate kiss on the forehead before making his way back towards his home. Neither of us said a word to one another, everything that needed to be said was seen in each other's eyes. That hole and sadness that needed to be filled was growing bigger as the night went by. 

Staring out the window, I thought about a future where I was able to think and chose my own path in life. I thought about marriage with the person I love and making a family with them. I thought about running away and living under an alias but that would only get me so far in life before realizing that you can never run away from your problems. I sighed as my hand absent-mindly played with the pebbled necklace around my neck. 

Reiner… I thought. I wonder what he’s thinking of at the moment. My head gently tapped on the glass window as my throat tightened at the thought of never being able to see him again. There were still so many things I wanted to tell and do with Reiner. I wanted to see the ocean, have a picnic and maybe even go on a date or two but instead here I am sulking at the thought of what could’ve been. I should’ve fought harder for what I wanted, but I was being a coward and stupid. I should’ve taken his hand and ran the opposite direction of mother but instead I complied to her demands like I always do. I could feel the tears wet my cheeks which made me close my eyes and drift to a place where I was free to do what I wanted and loved whomever I wanted. 

____

Three raps on the wooden door woke me up from my slumber. I groggily rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and sluggishly made my way towards the door. I took a deep breath before opening it, knowing that my mother was on the other side of the door. My hand reached for the knob and twisted it open to find a sad looking mother standing in front of me. 

“The military is here”, she said quietly. “Whatever you do, please decline. I can’t lose you too child”. She reached out to touch my shoulder only for me to pull away. If they were here it could only mean one thing, they wanted me to deploy out towards the war zone. I’ve heard that the situation out there was rough and that we were at war with more than one country at the moment but I didn’t expect to be called out this soon.

I hurriedly got out of my nightgown and out on a semi clean t-shirt and skirt before heading down the stairs and into the living room. Sitting on our loveseat couch was the Commander of the Medical Unit, Niklaus and the Captain, Alfred. I made my way towards the open seat next to my mother before greeting them and taking my seat. The tea was still hot, which means that they hadn’t been here for very long.   
“What brings you gentleman here today? I’m not part of the military, I just happen to work at the hospital there”, I explained. It wasn’t unheard of that they would try to recruit members by making home visits but it was a surprise to actually see it in person. Albeit I don’t think that today’s visit has anything to do with recruitment. 

“We have come to need your expertise on the field. It seems the new medics couldn’t handle the… Pressure… From their new job. So we would like to ask if you would want to volunteer your time and help your country out in this time of need”, said Niklaus in a soft gentle tone. I could tell that it was about more than just ‘new’ medics on the field from the way he delivered his sentence but he did a decent job at hiding it. 

I had originally signed up to work at the military hospital expecting that this would happen, so I was readily happy to accept when my mother reached for my hand. She was trembling with fear of losing me for good, but this is what I want. I wanted to help both Eldians and Marleyans, hopefully maybe see the world while I’m at it. I placed my hand atop my mother’s and gave it a tight squeezing before looking at the men sitting across from me. 

“Of course, you would be paid for your time. There is no need for you to enlist into the military, we just really need your skills out onto the field. There is only so much that me and Alfred can do out there”, Niklaus explained. 

Niklaus was the youngest appointed commander in the medical unit. Some say he got the position due to his skills others say he just got lucky and by lucky, they meant his higher ups ending up six feet under. He was very popular among the ladies due to his well built physique and beautiful face. He had a sun-kissed tan, a sharp chiseled jaw, long lashes and eyebrows that looked like they were just perfectly drawn and plucked with red hair and amber eyes that reminded me of Reiner. I couldn’t help but hold his stare a little longer before shifting my gaze to the man next to him, Alfred.

Alfred was a little older than Niklaus, maybe by a couple of years. He had wrinkles on his forehead and was bald with a caterpillar for a mustache. It was bushy and unruly, it looked like it hadn't been washed or kempt in days. He cleared his throat, signaling me for a response, I looked towards my mother before giving them my response. Looking straight into her eyes, I gave them the answer they wanted to hear and the one she didn’t. 

“I’ll be glad to give my time to serve my country. Isn’t it an honor mother?” I said with slight anger to my tone. I wanted her to feel hurt,so that when I’m not able to come back, it’ll be easier for her to breathe than when father went. I wanted her to think that I was mad at her for what she did to me last night and I wanted her to know that I was at war and despair with my feelings, just like Liberio. 

“But your wedding dear”, she lied while pleading with her eyes. I rolled my eyes and scoffed at her before standing up to look down on her. This was the only way she would let me go without a fight. 

“Wedding? Please mother, there was never going to be a wedding in the first place. My heart belongs to another”. I turned towards the two gentlemen sitting in front of me who was grinning with excitement. “When do I leave?” I asked. 

“Whenever it is convenient for you”, Alfred replied. 

“Well, how about now?” I suggested. They both looked at each other in delight before nodding their reply. 

“Now would be wonderful. We could leave with the Marleyan Warriors since we are heading to the same destination”. Alfred said a little too happily. I went to grab my coat and purse then headed for the door, receiving confused looks from both men.

“I assume I would be provided with the basic necessities and clothing. I don’t really need anything except for the things that are on me at the moment”, I told them with a smile on my face. Truth be told, I was nervous but I had to act brave for my devastated mother. I looked at my mother one last time before heading out towards the door. She looked distraught and broken that her own flesh and blood chose death than to be close to her. I wanted to give her the goodbye that she deserved but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. This was easier for both me and her, especially in the case that I may never return. 

The two men walked out after thanking my mother for her sacrifice and jogged to catch up to me. “You didn’t want to say goodbye?” Niklaus asked. 

Shaking my head no before replying, “It’ll be easier for her to think that I loathe her with every fiber of my being than telling her goodbye”. 

Niklaus nodded and led the way into the intermittent zone. I looked at the life around me one last time before being surrounded by darkness and death. I felt the wind wrap it’s goodbye around me and the leaves whispered it’s farewell. 

He led me to a room to grab supplies and change out of the clothes I was wearing into something more appropriate for the occasion. After procuring my supplies and uniform, I met them outside of the room and followed them out towards a carriage and from there began my new life away from Liberio.


	6. By Ship

I could smell the salty sea air as we approached the sea. Sticking my head out of the carriage window, I took a big whiff before Niklaus cautioned me to pull my head back inside. I’ve seen the sea before and even played on the beach but I’ve never traveled by ship. I assumed we were going to ride the train which I was excited for as well, but the ship seems like the better of the two. Well, to me anyway. When the carriage came to a full stop, I grabbed my bag and hopped out the carriage to look at the steel ship. It was huge and I was in awe. 

I felt like a five year old gawking at a shiny new toy, except this wasn’t a toy. It was an actual ship that was built by actual people, who are smarter than me. Seeing me marvel like this must’ve been what Reiner felt when he tasted candy for the first time. I remember the look he had when I gave him the sweet green candy and then a sour green candy afterwards. It was hilarious, the way he scrunched up his face when the sourness hit him. He thought he was getting another sweet candy but I was a mischievous kid back in the day. He should've known better than to trust me when it came to these things. In the end I got what I deserved, I laughed so hard that I peed myself. I didn't realize that I was chuckling out loud when Niklaus turned to look at me curiously, wondering what could've made me chuckled in a time like this. 

“Care to share?” Niklaus said as he interrupted my run along memory lane. 

"Oh, no… it's embarrassing", I said shyly. I mean was I really going to tell the guy I report to that I peed myself? No, no way. It's too embarrassing. 

"I'm sure I have an embarrassing tale or two. If you tell me, I'll tell you". 

I couldn't tell if he was being friendly or if he was up to something but needless to say, I will not be telling him. We aren't close enough to be sharing embarrassing past stories. 

"Mmm, tempting… but I'm still going to have to say no''. Niklaus chuckled and started walking up the ramp that connects the dock to the boat. He turned around looking confused as to why I didn't follow him. "Do I get on too?" It was a stupid question and I know the answer to it but I was nervous about starting my new life. For all I know, this would be the last time I would stand on land. 

As if sensing my anxiety, Niklaus walked back down the ramp to place a reassuring hand on my shoulder. "You'll be okay. Now let's go, I have to introduce you to some of the higher ups". Giving me a warm smile, he then turned back around and walked up the ramp. I slowly picked up my feet and followed behind him. 

As I was walking up towards the ship, I noticed a lot of the grunt work on the ship was being given to the Eldians while the easier work was being handled by the Marleyans. The Marleyans would be huddled in a small group chuckling with one another while the Eldians were busy scrubbing the deck. 

“Oi! Do your job right! Filthy devil!". I watch from the corner of my eye as the Marleyan sailor spit in front of the Eldian who was scrubbing the floor. "You missed a spot!" He laughed which encouraged the other sailors to join him with the harassment. I felt sorry for the guy and without realizing, I tugged on the bottom of Niklaus's sleeve. 

He stopped walking and turned his head to face me. "What's wrong?" He asked with concern. 

"Aren't you going to stop them?" I said while jutting my chin out towards the group. 

"No", he said firmly. He pulled his arm forward which caused me to let go of his sleeve. He looked back at the scene before walking again, this time a little quicker than before. 

I had to lightly jog to catch up to him before trying to ask him why he chose not to interfere. "Niklaus wait! Why not? You have the-". 

"Look Y/N, you are a guest on this ship. And this is their home for the next year or so. It's best if you just turn a blind eye and pretend you didn't see anything", he said in a warning tone. 

I looked at him in disbelief that a commanding officer would choose to ignore something like this. I stopped walking, contemplating on my next move. Should I interfere and risk getting in trouble or should I help him. My heart is telling me to help the Eldian but my brain is telling me to ignore him. Before I could make my decision, Niklaus called my name while holding a door open for me. He gave me a look of warning which decided my choice for me. I walked towards the door looking back hoping to see that they'd left him alone but only to be even more disappointed as they were now beating the Eldian sailor. I looked down ashamed of my choice and went inside to stand in the hallway waiting for Niklaus.

We didn’t say anything to one another for the rest of the way. Turning the corner, he brought me into a room which I assume to be a meeting area for the higher officials. There was a giant oval table with chairs to accompany it in the middle of the room. I scanned around looking to see who I would be spending the next months or years with. They all nodded with me as we made eye contact. Niklaus took his seat next to a blonde man with glasses while I chose to continue standing. I didn’t feel welcomed enough to make myself comfortable yet.

“You must be the new medic! Thank you for your service. I am General Theo Magath, and you’ve already met Niklaus Mikel and Alfred Tosh. The one next to Niklaus is Captain Zeke Jaeger of the Warrior Unit and the one across from him is Captain Alaric Bernbaum of the Libera, the boat we are currently on”. Theo Magath looked like a fit grumpy old man with a buzz cut. It seems like he has never smiled a day in his life with how serious he looks. 

“I assume Commander Mikel has told you about your position on your way here?” General Magath asked. 

Would it be bad to say I wasn’t? I was so focused on the carriage ride over here that I only got bits and pieces of what he had to say. 

“If you don’t mind sir, would you go over it with me one more time?” I asked, hoping that I didn’t offend Niklaus. 

“Of course I don’t mind! It’s good to want to be more thorough. Something you folks should pick up on. AHEM. Now, we have been having troubles finding medics to stay in the Eldian unit. I’m sure you know of the history with the Eldians but I just want to assure you, not all of them are ‘devils’ per say”. He looked over at Zeke before making eye contact with me again. “With that said, you are to be stationed with the Eldian Unit until further notice. If you have a problem, speak up now”. 

I was shocked to hear that a medical personnel refused to work with the Eldians out on the field. How was it any different from working with them at a hospital? I must have looked flabbergasted since the General had to ask if my silence meant I refused the offer. 

“No, sir. I do not refuse the offer. I’m just having a hard time believing that a medical personnel refuses to work with Eldians on the field but is fine working on them in the hospital”, I explained. 

“Have you seen a titan?” He asked. 

“No, sir. I have not”. 

“Then until you witness one yourself, keep an open mind on this matter. Jaeger will take you over to the Eldian Unit now. You will be staying with the Warrior Unit for now until we reach our destination, from there you will be sent to the medical unit and tend to those that are wounded. You are dismissed”. 

The general gave me a firm nod before looking over towards Zeke to tell him what he just told me. Zeke Jaeger got up from his seat and walked over to me with his hand extended. I grabbed his hand in a firm handshake and we both walked out of the room. Halfway down the hallway, we made a turn towards the stairway. It was lit with only one light bulb and the stairs were narrow and steep. I grabbed onto the railing and slowly made my way down the stairs. He offered me his hand and I took it as a form of courtesy. 

“By the way”, he started. “You can call me Zeke, I’m not sure about the others but I’m fine with us being on a first name basis. I also heard that you come from a well-off family. What brings you out here?”

“I wouldn’t say I’m from a well-off family. I didn’t even know that we had money until my father passed. Plus I wanted to help everyone despite where they came from or what they are. I don’t label people like a typical Marleyan does. I judge people based on their personality and attitude towards me, not because of where they were born or what type of blood they carry”, I explained.   
Zeke looked at me a little intrigued with my response before giving a small smile. “I think we’ll get along just fine”, he said. 

We reached another room after what felt like a journey. The room reminded me of the meeting room we were just in but smaller. Instead of an oval table it’s a rectangular table about the size of a dining table. In the room was a female and two other males. I looked around hoping to catch Reiner but he was nowhere to be found. 

“This is our meeting room, our dining room and our rec room. We are a small unit after all. The lady that is laying down on the couch is Pieck, the one with the yellow band is Colt and the one next to him is Porco. We have another one somewhere… He’s tall and a little distant, so don’t be too alarmed if he ignores you”, said Zeke. 

“Who is she?” Asked Colt. 

“Oh, right! This is the new medic that has been assigned to us and the Eldian Unit. Treat her well, we don’t want her to leave like the others. She has no military background and is here as a civilian. I was told that you were taught basic self-defense at the military hospital?”

“Yes, in the case of a combative patient, we are allowed to defend ourselves in any way necessary”, I answered. 

Porco snorted and rolled his eyes at me. I can tell that we aren’t going to get along very well. “Why do we need her? Bunk her with the rest of them, not us. We heal without her”, said Porco in an annoyed tone. 

“Just because you heal doesn’t mean I do, asshole!” Colt said while smacking Porco on the back of his head. 

“Don’t mind him, he’s just throwing a tantrum because he didn’t get the Vice Captain position. I mean what did you expect, you literally just became the Jaw Titan not too long ago”, said Pieck. The air felt heavy until Zeked cleared his throat.

“Well, I’ll let you all get acquainted. I have a meeting to go to. The ship leaves in thirty minutes, so whatever you do, do not get off the boat”, said Zeke as he walked out the door. 

I looked around when the door opened again. I assumed it was Zeke and made a joke about how quick the meeting was but when I turned, I was faced with Reiner. 

“Reiner”, I said softly. 

“Oh, what’s this? The two of you already know one another?” Pieck asked, a little confused. 

I mean who wouldn’t be, from their perspective, Reiner was gone the last five years and I was a random person they called on to help. How could we have met? For all they know, I could be a spy. I noticed that everyone was getting antsy, especially Porco. I was about to answer Pieck when Reiner beat me to it.

“We met when we were little and we’ve been friends ever since, I just didn’t expect to see her here. What are you doing here?” Reiner asked. The looks on everyone’s faces eased a little but not enough to completely drop their guard around me. 

“She’s the new medic. Since you two are buddies, show her to her bunk. It’s right across from yours”, Porco answered for me. 

Reiner’s eyes widened with surprise that I was actually standing in front of him but I could tell there was fear in it too. Fear that I wouldn’t look at him the same way after I see him transform into the monster everyone has been talking about. He nodded at Porco and held the door open for me and I stepped through it waiting for him to show me the way to my bunk. 

“You shouldn’t have come here”, Reiner said out of the blue. I was a little shocked at what he said but I guess I could understand where he was coming from. He probably thought I joined to retaliate against my mother. He’s partly right but that’s not the reason why I’m here. 

“To be clear, I didn’t just sign up for it. Commander Niklaus actually came to my house, practically begging me for my skills”, I said sarcastically. I put my hands together in a pleading motion while walking backwards facing Reiner. “He said, ‘Please Y/N. We will die out there without you. You’re so talented, only your miraculous hands can heal the wounded’”. 

“Really? Commander Mikel said that? That’s hard to believe”, Reiner said playfully. 

‘Yes, he did say- Ahh!” I tripped over my own foot and almost fell backwards when Reiner’s arm grabbed me by the waist. 

“Careful! If we lose your miraculous hands, who would save us?” He chuckled. 

Reiner’s face was so close to mine that our noses were practically touching. I closed my eyes thinking he’s going in for a kiss when he pushed a door open from behind me, causing me to lose my balance. I cleared my throat to brush off the embarrassment that just went down. Looking around the room I noticed a bed and a small table that had been bolted to the floor. 

“That’s a bed you can sleep on and a table for you to use. The bathroom is two doors down the left and it’s communal” he said as he pointed down left. I took the bag I carried with me off my back and tossed it onto the bed. 

“If you need anything I’m across from you”. Reiner stood by the door awkwardly before clapping his hands together. He then reached for the knob and opened the door, getting ready to leave when he hesitated and turned to look at me. “Well, I’ll let you get settled in and grab you for dinner”, he said as he was walking out the door. He was extremely awkward but cute at the same time. 

He left me alone with my thoughts as I sat down onto the bed and about ten minutes later, I felt the swaying motion of the boat being moved. I stood to look out the window as I watched the buildings get smaller and smaller with every passing minute. 

Time passed before I knew it and it was already dark out. I was curious what it would be like to be on the deck smelling the sea air at night. Getting up from the bed after lounging there all day, I fixed my hair before opening the door to find Reiner standing there looking flustered. I couldn’t help but giggle at him. 

“Do you-” we both said at the same time. 

“You go first-”, we did it again. 

“Do you want to go up on the deck with me?” I asked him finally. 

He nodded and we both proceeded towards the deck. We laughed and joked around about a bunch of ridiculous things, just like we did when we were little. There was never a dull moment with Reiner and I was glad. Everything seemed to be going perfect, way too perfect at the moment and something inside me just knew that perfect never lasts. 

As we got out onto the deck, a few Marleyan officers were out there smoking a cigarette and sipping on what I assume to be liquor. One of them looked at me as if he just had just won the lottery. 

“My, oh my. If it isn’t the lady from the restaurant. Ms. Legs Spread for the Devils”, the man slurred. He made his way over to us and stopped a couple feet away from me. From the name he called me by, he must’ve been at the restaurant when that entire fiasco with the mother of my former betrothed made a scene. “Oh and looky here, if it isn’t the devil you spread your legs for”, he chuckled. 

“Hey, you. Why don’t I stretch her out for you and give her back within hmm, a couple of hours? Or maybe tomorrow? I like to share my meals”, he said with a cantankerous tone. 

I can see Reiner getting riled up by the way his fists are clenched against his side. “Stay away from her”, he gritted through his teeth. 

The officer inched his way towards me and threw himself onto me as he got close. I let out a small scream and pushed on him, only to find that he wouldn’t budge. I bent my knee back ready to hit his precious jewels when Reiner knocked him onto the ground. The man on the ground groaned before completely passing out from the punch. Just when we thought we were free, another officer rushed in and stabbed Reiner in the lower left quadrant of his abdomen. Reiner doubled over and groaned before pulling the knife out and tossing it into the ocean. 

“That cost more than your shoes, you pig!” Screamed the man who stabbed him. 

“Maybe if you didn’t go around stabbing people with it, you might still have it!” I yelled back. He looked horrified and ran the opposite direction. “That’s right! Run you coward!”

I ran towards Reiner ready to rip my shirt open to place on his wound when his hand engulfed mine. “Don’t, it’ll heal. That’s one perk of being the inheritor of the nine”, Reiner grunted out. He looked up but not at me. His eyes were fixed behind me and I followed his gaze to find Niklaus standing a couple feet away from us, enraged.

“Both of you in the office now”, he ordered. 

I gulped down my frustration and followed Reiner to the office. I wasn’t going to let Reiner take the blame for something a Marleyan started. This was going to be the beginning of my fight.


	7. Frustration

After a long conversation with Niklaus, Reiner and I head back towards our bunks. But I couldn't get over how the conversation went. Niklaus basically had to warn me again about my behaviour and to respect these ignorant men. In my defense, I didn't do anything wrong. He was just picking sides and not listening to the story at all. You would think someone who was force to join the military after their country was taken over by Marleyans would be a little more understanding. I groaned and ruffled my hair in frustration. I needed to get rid of this pent up frustration and anger but being on a floating tin can, there's only so much one can do.

"What's wrong?" Reiner asked. 

"Nothing, I just have all this energy and nowhere to release it", I groaned and stomped my foot. Reiner laughed as his cheeks painted a light pink. 

He was imagining the two of you getting hot and steamy. Clearing his throat of those inappropriate thoughts, he thought that maybe if you sparred with him a little it could help. 

"You said you had some self defense training?" 

"Yea, why?" 

"Well I know an empty space where we could spar, just the two of us", he said a little nervously. I looked at him, excited, that I could finally let out some steam. He led the way down towards a small room that seemed to be used for storage. It wasn't big but there was enough space for just the two of us. 

"I know it's not that big in here but I think it's enough to do some punches". He shed his coat off and loosened his tie as he rolled his sleeve up above his elbows. I couldn't help but admire how strong his hands and arms look, the veins that popped up in his hand sent shivers down my spine. It was perfect. 

I shook my head out of my nurse mindset and rolled up my sleeves as well. Reiner had his palms up, waiting for me to make the first move. "I'm not gonna go easy on you, Reiner", I smirked as my eyes trace his perfectly built body.

"I won't hold back", he chuckled. 

"Good. Because I like it rough". I lunged forward and swung my arm to give him a jab on the jaw when he flinched back. I moved again, swinging and ducking when needed. He was good, but distracted. I took that as an opportunity to swiped his legs from underneath him and watched him fall onto his back. I stood straddling him as I lifted him up by his shirt. "Best two out three. Land me on my ass Reiner". 

I released him as he fell back onto the ground. He gave me a malicious grin before grabbing onto my shoulders and pushing me onto my back. "One, one", he smiled. 

A little annoyed that he played dirty, I wrapped my legs around him, pushing him into me so that I could flip him over. But before I could do that, he grabbed a hold of both my wrists and held them above my head. I grunted out in frustration as I tried pulling my hands out of his hold. "Who's soft now?" His voice, rough and smooth at the same time. I felt a familiar rush through me as he leaned his head down closer to mine. His breath fanned my lips and I can smell the coffee he had for dinner. 

I lifted my head up closing the gap and our lips collided with one another. I poured all of my built up emotion into that kiss. I wanted him to feel the pain I felt, waiting for him to return and the pain of losing him. His hold on my wrist loosened and my hands immediately went to wrap around his neck. I needed this. We needed this. This tension that we've been holding back is waiting to be released. 

I parted my lips allowing his tongue to collide with mine. The kiss was aggressive like the war we were heading towards. Our tongues clashed and our teeth knocked into one another but I didn't care. All I wanted right now was Reiner. And I wanted all of him. My hands moved up towards his hair as his hands moved down to the side of my hips. I lifted my hips into his growing erection which pulled a moan from him. God, that moan was like life itself. It was something I've been waiting to hear and now that I've heard it, I can't get enough. "Reiner", I moaned. "I want you", I managed to breathe out in between kissing him. 

His lips left mine and I whined at the loss of heat. He looked me in the eye with a light that I can't explain. His hand rubbed my cheeks as he admired me. "I want you too, Y/N". He dips back down to kiss my cheeks, my jaw line, and down onto my neck. Stopping to suckle my skin as he found the sweet spot on my neck. My hands gripped his hair as I pushed him down into me. I wanted him close to me, in any way possible. I wanted to become one with him. 

Planting my right foot onto the ground, I used that force to push him onto his back. I wanted to show him how badly I've wanted him. I wanted to show him why I turned down all those marriage proposals. I wanted to show him why I volunteered and why I was here today. I was going to give him all of me. 

Planting my hands on each side of his head, I leaned down and started my attack. I kissed him with a fervent need to survive and slowly made my way down. Unbuttoning his shirt, I kissed his collarbone before licking my way up his neck to nibble on his ear. "Fuck", he shuddered as I place a kiss against him. 

His hands gripped onto my hips and I took that as a sign to push my core down on him. Moans escaped both of our lips. At this point, I don't even know if I could last teasing him. I could feel my core drip with need with every moan he makes. His face contorted with pleasure as he bit his bottom lip. Even that expression sent me into a blazing heat. 

He sat up adjusting himself before taking my shirt off. He marveled my breasts before taking them into his hands and lightly squeezed them. I gasped at the way his rough hand made me feel. I could feel something build inside of me as he pinches my nipple while staring into my eyes. I could feel the heat radiating from him, and just like me, he was holding himself back. 

"Don't hold back, take me Reiner. All of me". He didn't have to think twice before unclasping my bra and tossing it to the side. His mouth hungrily claimed one breast while he played with the other. I moaned a little too loudly as he bit and sucked my nipple hard. My arms wrapped around the back of his neck pulling him into me. I grinded my hips into him and his moans vibrated on my breast. "Fuck, Reiner. I need you so bad right now". 

I pulled his head away from my breast to kiss him again. My hand traced his hard chest and chiseled abs, finding its way towards the buckle of his pants. I got up and I threw my boots to the side as he did the same. As we stripped down in front of one another, our eyes were locked, never breaking eye contact. Everything about this moment just felt right. The sound of the wave lapping onto the boat, even the shitty lighting and the smell of metal and sea water combine felt right. 

My eyes slowly raked over his body, stopping at his erection which was hard and ready to go. "You're beautiful", he said as he looked me over. 

I walked towards him and pushed him back down onto the floor. The coolness of it did nothing to bring down the heat I was feeling. My hand wrapped loosely around his neck before leaving love bites on his neck, claiming him as mine. I could feel him against my wet folds and I rubbed my arousal on him. 

"Ahh…", he moaned. I aligned his tip with my opening and slowly pushed down. His hand gripped onto my waist as his tip entered me. His grip on my tightened as my walls clenched around his tip. Leaning my forehead against his, I sank further down onto him. My mouth opened and gasped at how much he stretched me. I was aroused enough to where I'm not feeling the pain others would experience with their first time. "Mmm...", he let out. Pushing myself down again, I felt a resistance and Reiner's hand left my waist to cup my cheek. His thumb rubbed my cheeks in an endearing way that made my chest tightened. "I don't want to hurt you", he said gently. His voice deep and laced with lust which sent liquid down to my burning core.

"You won't hurt me". I assured him with a deep and slow kiss as I pushed myself down, breaking the barrier that kept us from becoming one. I gasped, at the slight popping sensation as Reiner kept my lips onto his. My core clenched around him and he grunted, bucking his hips up into me. He broke our kiss and left wet kisses down onto my neck to suckle on the spot that made me mewl with need. My hips began to rock as he heightened the pleasure. The only sound that could be heard was the sound of our skin against one another. The room smelt of sex and sweat as I rode him deep and hard. Feeling the warmth gathering at my core, I felt my oragasm nearing and Reiner’s dick twitched inside me. Which told me he was probably getting close as well. I thrust a couple more times and white flashed behind my lids causing me to bite down onto his shoulder as I rode out my orgasm and milked him of his. 

I was being overstimulated but I didn't care. I wanted this and I wanted him, until someone interrupted us and banged on the door. 

"Oi! Reiner! When you're done fucking, Zeke wanted to talk to you!" Called out a voice that sounded like Porco's. 

We both looked at one another and started laughing. How long was he staying there to know when to knock? Getting up to get dressed, he fixed my hair and gave me a kiss before opening the door. 

"I'll see you after the meeting?" 

I nodded and headed back to my room giddy with euphoria. It didn't take long for him to knock onto my door that night. This time, he didn't look calm and collected. He looked ravenous and I was his meal


	8. Morning After

The night before was never ending and no matter how many times we did it, I wasn't able to sate his needs and he wasn't able to sate mine. The emotions we held within the last five years poured out like a broken dam as our bodies came together as one. I could tell that there was more to this than just his feelings, it was like he was using me to forget. He would start out soft and slow, loving even and then a switch would flip. His pace turned into something more feral and aggressive but gentle at the same time. It was as if he was angry, but it wasn't anger towards me. Maybe, it was anger towards himself. 

I turned myself over to the side with my back against Reiner and I could feel my muscles ache and my core burned. My face heats as I recall the memory from last night. Just as I was about to slip off the bed, Reiner's arm draped over me. He tucked his hand under my hip and pulled me against him. "Morning", he hummed as he nuzzled his nose into the crook of my neck. His nose grazed my skin, sending little goosebumps down my flesh. His hand left my hip as he traced the shape of my ass and curves all the way down to my breast. 

His fingers found my nipple and he gave them a light squeeze. He nibbled on the lobe of my ear as he gently applied more pressure into my nipple. I instinctively arched my back which caused my ass to press against his arousal. We both let out a small moan of need. I craned my neck back, capturing his lips in a sloppy kiss as he pushed me down onto my stomach. 

He brushed my hair away from my neck as he littered my back with soft feather-like kisses. I couldn't help but let out a small giggle when he kissed an area that tickled me. 

"Holy fuck, you turn me on so much", he growled out. "I want to put my mark all over you, and claim you as mine and mine alone". He kissed the small of my back before licking his way back up towards my shoulder and nipped it. 

"Reiner!" I gasped. It didn't really hurt, it just took me by surprise. I was aware that my body was already covered with his marks and one more wouldn't have made a difference. It was strange to me that I found it arousing, his little bites and the way he grabs me would send liquid heat down my core.

"Sorry, I'll try to be gentle. I just can't help myself. You make the cutest little noises". His hand found its way between my thighs and they slid down between my folds causing my breath to hitch. Leaning down close to my ear, he whispered huskily. "You're so wet for me already". Slipping one finger inside of me, I bit onto the pillow to muffle my cries. He then added another, and picked up his pace and I began to rock against his hand. I could feel the familiar heat rushing to my core when he decided to pull his fingers out of me. I whimpered at the loss of friction.

"I want to feel you come undone, just like all those other times. I want us to finish together", he said as he slowly pushes his dick inside me. I raised my ass, pushing him deeper into me as he thrust his hips. I reached around to grab onto his perky ass, squeezing it as I near my end. It didn't take long for him to catch up to me. He trusted a couple more times and I could feel his release inside me. My core clenched as his dick twitched. I let out a breathless giggle as each twitch sent pleasure waves throughout my body. 

I remained on my stomach, panting trying to catch my breath when I could feel wet drops on my back. His head nuzzled into my hair before as he sobbed. Concerned, I flipped around while he still had me trapped underneath him.

"Reiner, what's the matter?" I asked while wiping his tears away. 

"I can't… I can't lose you too…", he sobbed even harder as he wrapped his arms tightly around me. My suspicions about him losing Berthholdt and Annie must've been right. They probably died while doing whatever they did down at the island. And I wasn’t going to ask him about it, he will tell me when he’s ready and that could be never. 

I rubbed my circles down his back, soothing him. He must've blamed himself for their deaths, and now he can't seem to live with the guilt. The cheerful Reiner that I met was still in there, but he's numbing himself by putting on a face only I can see through. I didn’t want him to have to carry this burden alone. "You're not going to lose me, Reiner". He cried even more as I told him that. I pulled him closer and held him tighter, afraid that if I let go now I might lose him too. 

We did it another two more times until the first ray of sun peeked through the curtains. The sun shone on his face, illuminating his eyes as he looked at me. His smile radiated and my chest clenched with a warm feeling. 

I looked at his arms and chest, and realized the little bites and hickeys were gone. "That's not fair, I'm covered with your marks and you have none. Even though I knew I left some on you", I mumbled into my hands. 

"I'm sorry, I tend to heal quickly. I tell you what, you can mark me anywhere and I'll try my best to leave it", he chuckled huskily. 

The way he chuckled was enough to send me through another wave of heat. I pushed him onto his back, straddling him and lightly grazing my finger on his chest. "Should I leave one here?" I pointed at his left pec. Without waiting for a reply, I leaned down and sucked and nipped hard making sure to leave a mark. He shuddered a moan and I kissed my way up to lick the shell of his ear. His hands found their way to my hips and his fingers dug into my skin. 

"Maybe another one down here", as I licked my way down to the base of his neck and lightly sucked on it. It was there but light, and he could keep it covered with the collar of his shirt. I made my way down towards his hips and left trails of wet kisses. He bucked his hips up and I pushed him back down. 

"If you keep doing that, I'm not going to be able to control myself", he warned. The corner of his lips lifted into a sly grin. 

I got up off the bed and put on a pair of pants and I heard him groan from behind me. I did that so we could leave the bedroom and get on with our day. Someone had to do it. I don't mind being stuck in here with him all day, but I've been warned more than once. "If those marks are still on you after the end of the day, I'll give you a treat". I winked at him and grabbed a towel. 

He grabbed onto my wrist and leaned down kissing my neck before whispering into my ear. "I'll meet you in the second shower stall". He gave my ass a tight squeeze before letting me go into the bathroom. It was a communal shower and I just hoped that he wouldn't try anything funny in there while people are around. 

I walked into the second stall as he told me too. I began setting my things down when the shower curtain pulled open and he sneaked inside. He turned on the water and I was blasted with cold water. I was about to scream at him when someone else walked into the shower next to us. He put a finger on my lip, signaling me to be quiet as he adjusted the temperature of the water. 

When it was warm enough, he lapped at my breast and I had to bite onto my knuckles to silence myself. Meanwhile, the person next to us was humming a small tune. He made his way down to my core and licked between my folds. I fisted his hair as I try not to scream. He smiled against me and nipped at my nub causing me to let out a small whimper. The person next to us stopped humming and cleared their throat, there was a weird tension in the air and I glared at Reiner for causing it. 

He gave me a playful smile before turning me around so my ass was facing him and he inserted himself without warning. He started out slow, making sure our skin wouldn't touch. Impatient person that I was, I pushed myself down to his base and grinded down on his dick. This was the only way I knew how to keep our flesh from slapping against one another. 

His arm wrapped around me and his fingers found my clit. He rubbed it up, down, side to side, and he even managed to put the right amount of pressure. He could tell I was getting close due to the way my walls were tightening around around his dick. He pushed us against the wall as he put his arm out for me to bite down on. I was so close, and when he pinched my nipple, I came undone and bit his arm breaking skin. Not long after, he came and we both stood there with shaky legs, not wanting to move. 

He finally pulled out of me and carefully washed me with soap after. He was gentle and sweet, glowing as he smiled. Sneaking out of the shower together, I ran back to my room afraid of getting caught with Reiner and to change into a more appropriate outfit for the day. We both met each other in the hallway, giggling as we made our way to our respectable area. 

I was to meet up with Niklaus and go over some training materials with him. When I got to his office, he was buried in a pile of paperwork and didn't have time to even look up at me. He ushered me to sit at the study table in his office and read up on the material I needed to know. As I handed the finished reading material, he noticed the bruises on my wrists. 

"Were you taken advantage of?" He asked out of the blue. 

"No, sir. I wasn't. What made you ask?" He pointed at my wrist and I pulled the sleeve down to cover them. 

"These look like rope marks… Tell me the truth, and the person who did this will be reprimanded. You were supposed to be in my care, and I've let you down. I apologize". He sounded a little distraught and he looked stressed. He probably assumed the men from the night before had taken me by force sometime in the night. 

I sighed and cleared my throat, embarrassed that I have to explain why there were bruises on my wrists. "After you let me go last night, I had to… let go of some of the frustration…". 

"Okay", he said. I could see he was trying to figure out where this story was going. His eyebrows furrowed with concern and I looked off to the side, scratching the back of my head. My cheeks rose with embarrassment when I had to look him in the eye again. "And?"

"And I had Reiner… help me…". I looked down embarrassed, toeing the floor. I didn't dare look up at him now. 

"Reiner helped you…" his face twisted and turned until the light bulb finally went up in that dense brain of his. "Oh.. Oh! I see". He pulled onto my wrist, lightly grazing his thumb on the affected area. He looked at it as if he wished that he was the one who had given them to me. I gave him an uncomfortable stare until he finally let go. He cleared his throat and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Let's get lunch", he said as he abruptly got up from his chair. I nodded and followed him to the cafeteria. 

I was getting stares all around from the men. Rumors about me sleeping around were spreading like wildfire after last night's incident. I subconsciously tugged on my collar and sleeves to cover Reiner’s marks. Niklaus noticed but didn't say a thing until a sleazy officer decided to make his move. 

"Why don't you have fun with me tonight", the man grinned. 

Niklaus walked up behind me and whispered for me to play along. He glared daggers at the man who then gulped as a superior officer just eyed him a warning. "Unfortunately, she wouldn't be able to tonight. She'll be with me, down in the med bay. Doing her job". The man proceeded to walk away and I turned around to look at him. I grabbed my food and found a seat at an open table. 

Niklaus grabs his food and chooses to sit next to me. Crossing my arms, I looked at him with my brows knit together. "I can fight my own battles. I don't need you to do it for me". 

"I know", he said as he stabbed a fork through a potato. "But these are horny military men that'll do anything to get into those pants of yours. And unless someone, who isn't an 'Eldian Devil' steps their foot down for you, you'll be getting the brunt of it all". He shoved the potato into his mouth and stabbed into another. "And since you're under my division, I don't want unnecessary drama". 

"But didn't you just create an unnecessary drama, just now?"

"No, because unlike you, I'm really well respected". I rolled my eyes at him and continued eating my food when Reiner set his plate down on the other side of me. His legs brushed against my thigh and I blushed, ignoring the heat that is creeping on. 

"Reiner", Niklaus said with no emotion. "Good to see you".

"Likewise, Commander". 

"You do know you could just call me by my name right?"

"I don't think we're close enough to be doing that, Commander". 

The tension in the air was thick. It felt like I was sitting between two alphas and they were going to lash out at each other anytime. Reiner brushed his knuckles against my thigh and I cleared my throat warning him. I slapped my chest, pretending that the food went down the wrong pipe when Reiner’s hand brushed my inner thigh. I let out a small whimper and Niklaus shifted in his seat. Reiner’s hand was getting dangerously close to my heat causing me to let out a shaky breath. I crossed my legs which caused his hand to move back to his lap as he let out a small chuckle. 

‘Dick’, I thought to myself. 

I shoved whatever was left of my plate into my mouth and got up, leaving the two boys at the table alone. “Niklaus, I’ll meet you down at med bay as planned”. I looked over at Reiner and gave him a nod before walking away to put my plate into a bucket with the other dirty dishes. 

There was no one else down in med bay, which was to be expected since we were still making our way out towards the war zone. I looked around, familiarizing myself with the things in the room just in case I needed to use them. Just when I thought I was alone, I heard movements coming from one of the beds. 

“Oh, it’s you”, I said with a breath of relief. Pieck was laying in one of the beds as she was waking up from her sleep. “Are you sick?” 

“No, I just didn’t get enough sleep last night”. She sat up on the bed and yawned, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. “I didn’t know someone could be doing it all night, I mean… I wasn’t surprised that Reiner could last but you, I was shocked”. Your face turned red as you realized that she didn’t get any sleep because of you. 

“I’m sorry, it won’t happen again!” I bowed down apologizing. Pieck started laughing and waved her hand at me. 

“It’s okay, enjoy life while you still have it!” She winked and got up out of the bed. “I’ll see you around”, as she walked out of the door. 

I sat on the bed, embarrassed that someone heard me. 

“I guess you were in the shower next to mine this morning, and from the sounds of it you weren’t alone”. 

I flinched in surprise and looked up to see Niklaus leaning by the door. I shoved my face into the palms of my hands and wished I was melting away. “I’m sorry that you heard that!” 

“It’s okay, it wasn’t the first time!” He chuckled. “I just didn’t expect to know who the people were”, he teased. 

“Okay! Okay!” I groaned and laughed at the same time. When I get back to my bunk, I really need to talk to Reiner about being more discreet. 

_____  
Meanwhile in the Warrior Units Meeting Room:

“Reiner! Did you have to be so goddamn loud?!” Yelled Porco.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you tell I'm really thirsty for Reiner! LOL


End file.
